|
Even White Boys Have to Shout
|
|
|
| Many of us love hurt-comfort, but could you please think a little? |
[19 Jul 2009|06:45pm] |
Okay.
In Hetalia canon, we have the personifications of nations walking around and making moe eyes at each other. Good so far, very fic-friendly. But could you please remember that these cute guys are also countires?
( Rant is here )
tl;dr - I like h/c, but make it work with the canon and it will be so much better.
|
|
| it's intoxicating! |
[19 Jul 2009|02:07pm] |
Your main character is a fit & healthy man, about 6', probably weighing in the range of 160-170lbs. That is, normal body size & shape for his age.
If he has about five mouthfuls of liquor (you didn't specify what type so I'm assuming a spirit of some sort) in the early hours of the morning and then nothing after that, it's seriously unlikely that he will still be drunk over 24 hours later. Some really unlucky people might be, but not this guy. He might be slightly hungover in the morning, but that's pretty much the extent of it.
Alcohol affects everybody in a different way and everyone's mileage varies, but there's variation and then there's just being silly.
edit for unit!fail.
|
|
|
[19 Jul 2009|02:04am] |
I'm not sure I have any right to complain about this, given how long it took me to figure out that Hermione Granger (being British) would say "car park" rather than "parking lot", but I'm absolutely dead certain that the Winchester boys (being American) would say "parking lot", not "car park".
Keeping secrets from each other was in neither brother’s nature; was difficult at best and not something either chose to do unless powerfully forced into it. Did you not see "Bloody Mary"? Or "Hunted"? How long went by between "All Hell Breaks Loose" and "In the Beginning"? Sam and Dean are very good at keeping secrets from each other. (Not all secrets. Just the important ones.) If you got any other impression, I really don't think we're watching the same show.
Sam’s intense fear of fire—since you're the same author as the above paragraph, I am now positive you and I aren't watching the same show, because I definitely recall scenes, lots and lots and lots of scenes, in which Sam flambés things and watches Dean flambé things with no indication of fear.
Bela Talbot was introduced in season three. Bela Talbot died in season three. Odds are, therefore, that any fic including Bela Talbot will take place in season three. So is there really any need to mention that the fic takes place in season three? (Other than the obvious 'spoilers up to 3xwhatever', but plenty of these claim to spoil season four, so...)
|
|
| Warning! Warning! Warning! |
[18 Jul 2009|11:42pm] |
Obligatory disclaimer: YMMV
This warning entitlement thing? So getting out of hand. I think warnings are a good thing. Death, non-con, BDSM, PWP, kink, incest, slavery, self-insert, etc. Seriously, the offensensitivity meter on some people is set way too high. They absolutely must be warned for anything that might set off their triggers, whatever those may be. Divorce, breech childbirth, kitten stuck in trees, lactose intolerance, congressmen with wide stances, any disordered, dysfunctional, or unethical behavior must be warned for! Or you get yelled at. Or someone rants about it somewhere. At what point may the author quit flipping through the DSM-IV and matching up potential diagnoses with developments in a fic for warning lists?
I am not anti-warning. I think a considerate person should have warnings up when the plot hits the buttons of a significant number of fans who might open the story. If I kill off a major character, I warn for it. If I have fluffy crap, I warn for it. Most fandoms have an understood or actual list of usual warnings. I am against people thinking that a writer should warn for everything that anyone, and them in particular, might find objectionable, offensive, or triggering in the story. I'm not warning for alcoholism, cheating, divorce, marriage, gambling addiction, or whatever. It's too much to try to figure out what dysfunctions I've woven into my story might bother someone somewhere and then put in a long list of warnings. And then hope it doesn't spoil the fic. It just can't be done. Everything annoys someone, somewhere.
|
|
|
[18 Jul 2009|10:47pm] |
A completely non-Naruto related, possible wankery rant by Lightning O, for once
Hey, uh, your summary had me thinking ( ...cut for consent issues )
|
|
|
[18 Jul 2009|10:43pm] |
OK, author? You know the French guy? The one who was born and raised in France, has a French accent so thick I could pick it up and beat you over the head with it, and has to keep asking what English words mean because his first language is French and all?
If he got a MySpace message in French, he probably would not need to run it through an online translator because he's "so used to speaking in English".
Just a thought.
|
|
| Let's Talk About Weight |
[18 Jul 2009|07:58pm] |
Dear young female fic writers in general (and young female HP fic writers in particular)*,
Please stop describing your characters as "thin but curvy." Thin women generally have small hips and small breasts. Curvy women generally have broad hips and larger breasts. Given the context, I think you want us to picture someone with a tiny waist and hips (thin) and huge breasts (curvy.) Not to put too fine a point on it, but breasts are fat tissue. Hence, unless surgical enhancement was involved, your very thin character will not have a D-cup rack. If you look at naturally thin actresses like Kiera Knightley and Kyra Sedgwick, you will notice that they do not have exceptionally large breasts. Please take note of this, and remember there is absolutely nothing wrong with being just plain curvy, sans the thin, or with being just plain thin, sans the curvy. See Marilyn Monroe and America Ferrera for examples of the former, and Kate Bosworth and Natalie Portman for examples of the latter. Your fic will be much better for giving your character a figure that actually occurs in nature.
Frustratedly yours,
Jamie
P.S. If you have your 5'4" character worrying that she is not thin enough at 113 pounds and wanting to "get down to 100 to be thin" I will be both insulted (I'm 5'5" and 130 pounds and not fat at all, thankyouverymuch), and more than a little worried for your health. Also, it might give readers less secure in their image than I issues, especially if they really like/look up to your character.
*I understand this is a bit of a generalization, but most stories of this type I have read have been written by young women (11-15.)
ETA: Sorry if I offended anyone-I do realize that there are thin people with large breasts naturally, and I do apologize if I inadvertantly insulted you. The rant is more about the perception that some fanfic writers seem to have that the very thin'n'busty figure is the only attractive one, and that it is much more common than it actually is. I just wish that all of us (from thin, to average like me, to curvy) could get some love in fanfic (and hell, real life) for our figure types.
|
|
|
[18 Jul 2009|07:37pm] |
Dear Fandom,
Sorry for beating a dead horse, but I'm disappointed in (general) you. It's the 2000s, yeah? I'm sure most of us have been taught that gender equality is a Good Thing, and I'm sure a lot of us, like me, even consider ourselves feminists.
...Can we please stop being sexist now? (I'm directing this rant mostly at you, fellow slashers.)
There's a very serious double standard going on here. Character A: Clingy girl who, in the beginning of the series, is annoyingly persistent about getting this guy who's not interested in her. Character B: Clingy guy who, in the beginning of the series, is annoyingly persistent about getting this guy who's not interested in him.
Both characters grow throughout their respective series, and they become much more mature, confident, independent people. And less clingy, too. Oh, but what do you know? Most fans can't stand Character A. She gets bashed a lot, and usually portrayed as a caricature of her useless former self, not as the strong woman she becomes. Meanwhile, Character B is also usually portrayed as his bratty former self, but he also has a giant cult of obsessively devoted fans who like the fact that he's annoyingly persistent. Fans who like the fact that he's always yelling/nagging at the guy he's in love with, and who like how he flies into fits of jealous rage when there's even the slightest possibility of his potential love interest forming a relationship with someone else.
Let's get this straight. (Haha. Horrible pun not intended.) A lot of female characters are hated because it's so "gross" when they're chasing unrequited love, or when they need to be rescued, or when they're trying too hard to be sexy. But it's okay for a male character to do these exact same things?
D: WTF is wrong with this world?!
(In case you guys are wondering, the characters who inspired this rant are Sakura from Naruto and Wolfram from Kyou Kara Maou, though the problem isn't just about them. Replace Sakura for Generally Useless Girl and Wolfram for Every Other BL Guy and it still happens, because BL Guys can get away with everything that their female equivalents can't. And no, I'm not bashing Wolf - I actually like the mature versions of both of these characters.)
|
|
| Oh femslash randomness |
[18 Jul 2009|09:19pm] |
Ok, so...
When you, specific author, says the following in a femslash fic (names replaced for confidentiality):
"Maria licked Joana's lower breasts (...)"
It makes me imagine Joana having two pairs of breasts. And after that, when you say:
"(...) Joana whimpers as Maria starts kissing her middle breasts (...)"
... Well, that makes me imagine Joana having three pairs of breasts. Let me tell you, it's a weird image. And I don't even know why! (Why you make me imagine that, not why it's a weird image.)
And this is just sharing a weird fact, because this has never happenned before; but every time you, same author, say something like "Joana reaches her arm (...)", "Maria looks at her breast (...)", or even "She pulls her leg aside (...)", can you tell what happens within my imagination?
I'll tell ya. I imagine that they have only one of whatever you just said. It's pretty weird suddenly imagining a one-armed Joana when in canon she has both arms perfectly intact. I'm not saying it's written wrong; it's just weird and hilarious at the same time because this is the only story that makes me imagine things like that.
So, in the end, I still appreciate your story because it just gave me some good laughs. :D
|
|
| I must be feeling ranty this weekend |
[18 Jul 2009|06:01pm] |
Dear FFN HP author:
Hermione, Ginny, and Luna all like each other. I know this comes as a shock to you, seeing as they form the other half of the three most popular Harry het ships in fandom, but it's true. It took a while for Hermione and Ginny to warm up to Luna, but they have. Hermione is not going to discourage Harry from being friends with Luna in a post-OOTP fic. Ginny is not secretly planning to destroy Hermione's friendship with Harry. Luna likes both of them as much as she does Harry. Remember the mural in DH? Just because you see one or both of the girls as competition for your OTP does not mean they are not friends.
Also, I'm not buying "Ginny the psychopath" unless she's been hit with a curse or major head trauma (which could be an interesting fic come to think of it).
|
|
| [ SECRET POST #925 ] |
[18 Jul 2009|06:01pm] |
⌈ Secret Post #925 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
101. 
( More! )
Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 21 pages, 514 secrets from Secret Submission Post #133.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 3 4 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 4 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 1 2 3 4 - repeat ], [ 1 2 - doing it wrong ], [ 1 2 3 4 - posted twice ], [ 1 2 - empty comments ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
|
|
|
[18 Jul 2009|04:37pm] |
Dude. Dude, seriously. You can't just write down scenes from the canon word-for-damn-word and pretend that's a fanfiction. We all know those scenes from the canon. We probably all know them by heart (it is a small fandom and it is a very small body of canon to draw from). You're not changing anything, you're not adding anything (the minor bullshit framing story you've put around those scenes from the canon is hardly sufficient), and you're essentially not writing fanfiction because there is NO FAN-ADDED FICTION GOING ON.
I've seen this complaint a couple of times from other fandoms and did not expect to have to make it in mine. I have been disappointed.
|
|
| Bleach and general rants |
[18 Jul 2009|06:37pm] |
1) Can you please, please, please either warn for incest or give the pairing in the summary? It's really not pleasant to suddenly run into surprise father/son incest. YKINMK, I know, but this is one of the things that, personally, I think should really be warned about.
2) I know it's one possible meaning of the poor boy's name, but can we please stop with all the mentions of strawberries in titles or summaries for Ichigo-centric fics or chapters? Please? Even KT only went there once, for his chapter titles.
( Bleach spoilers, if you're not up to date on the manga )
4) Bleach characters randomly breaking out into American chart hits? Fail! Especially if you're using anime and manga canon, rather than the musical one. Am I the only person on the Pit who likes Burimyu and is tempted to write fic based on those characterisations?
5) You do not have to be bigger than someone to beat them up. Really, you don't.
6) Physical attacks are not the only form of bullying in existence. And lashing out with your fists is not the only way to retaliate, especially when such an act is OOC.
7) Women can sexually harass men. It isn't a completely one-way thing, y'know.
( Cut for stupidity of a brain breaking level )
ETA for grammar clarification, general clarification and adding the last comment I meant to add when I accidentally hit the post button.
|
|
| Spare the makers from RVB from seeing this. We need another series. (Word of the Day) |
[18 Jul 2009|11:43pm] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Namikaze Satellite |
] |
"this is what it would be like if all the caricters in redvsblue came from a city named blood gulch i have no amagenashon wen it comes to names and all went to the same high school so this is redvsblue before the war"
Do you mean 'imagination?' Epic fail. On other note, Red vs Blue is a good demonstration of the brilliance of human 'amagenashon.'
Edit: Here's another classic...
grig comes back from comand after sarge put him in a coma and we find out that they have given him his so caled dead girlfrend navadas A.I sigma but if you thinc that is the bigest problem you are sadly mastacen this will be the oltament redvsblue sotry
You will be sadly-mastacen if you expect to garner something good from her so caled sotry despite the oltament example of bad spelling shown in the description.
Ps: To the other bloke here, regurgitating lines from the series in script format does not count as a original fanfiction.
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
tastypirate's Friends Page
